GUIDELINES FOR FAMILIES
by Dr. Christopher S. Amenson

What You Can Do

1. Keep the family strong.
   Keep yourselves happy and healthy. Take care of each other and encourage each other.

2. Support the one who has psychotic symptoms.
   Love and accept him as he is now (or her as she is now)
   Help him or her find good treatment. Provide a healing family atmosphere.

How to Create a Healing Family Atmosphere

1. Love and accept the person who has psychotic symptoms as he or she is now, ill. Don't expect him or her to feel and act well all the time.
2. Blame the illness, not the person, for the symptoms. It is not deliberate misbehavior.
3. Set realistic, reachable goals.
4. Include the person who has psychotic symptoms in the family.
5. Keep a loving distance. Be close, but not too close.
6. Keep a calm atmosphere without expressing emotions

FAMlLY COMMUNICATION SKILLS

1. To get a person to do more of something, make a positive request:
      -  Look at the person.
      -  Tell them the good feeling it would give you if they did what you want.
      -  Say exactly what you would like them to do.
      Examples:
             I would like you to_________________
             I would really appreciate it if you would__________________
             It would make me feel good if you would___________
             It's very important to me that you help me with the_____
2. To get a person to do less of something, express negative feelings calmly.
       -  Look at the person. Speak firmly.
       -  Say exactly what you want to have the person stop doing.
       -  Tell them the bad feeling you get when they do the thing you don't like.
       -  Suggest how they might keep this from happening in the future.
      Examples:
      It makes me very sad when you sleep until noon. Please get up at 11:00 AM.
      It makes me very anxious when you yell at me. Please sit down with me and tell me calmly
3. Handle only one thing per session.
       Do not mix praise and criticism, as in
       "Thanks for washing the dishes, but there is still egg on the forks".
4. Set limits to head off serious problems.
      -   Be clear and specific about what is unacceptable.
      -   Remain calm but firm.
     Example:
          You can not live at home unless you take your medicine.